Whirlwind

My kids still have 3 weeks left before they start school, and I am so grateful! It seems like so much of the country is already back in school. We? are going to soak up these last dog days of summer.

This weeks should be filed under the “wha?” column, as so many little things are going on that I’m distracted enough to not have a CLUE as to the date, or day of the week, or time. One foot in front of the other, that’s how it’s rolling this week.
Our good friends moved (booo), but then Ruthie and her youngest (actually, her foster child) stayed here until yesterday. Ruthie had to work, and she had yet to find out if she could take her foster child out of state with her. This morning her 8 year old son started 3rd grade, so she really wanted to be there for that, ya know? However, she didn’t know until YESTERDAY at 4:30pm if she could take her youngest with her. (She can, for now. It’s still going to be a long process.)
It was so cozy and nice having them here. They were busy- she was working; he was at daycare- so I didn’t need to entertain them. But then, late afternoon, she’d show up, and chop vegetables with me for dinner, or give Marin her after-nap cuddles, or crack open a beer. We’d make dinner and visit and pet the children if they wandered by.
Anyway, it was really nice and natural, yet hard to be too sad about the fact that she was moving since the bigger issue was obviously the foster situation. I mean, boo-hoo my friends are moving versus HOLY FUCK what’s going to happen with this sweet 3 year old… hardly any competition, ya know?
Meanwhile, Kate and Joan are in a community play and have spent all week at rehearsals. Every morning one or the other has said “I can’t WAIT for play practice today”, and man if you haven’t seen your kid doing something she really really loves… SIGH. These girls are getting so big, and I can sincerely say that I’m… honored, I guess, is the word… to witness them unfolding into more advanced versions of themselves.
It’s a good think they love the play, because we planned our trip to Rapid City around it. The performances are on Friday evening and Saturday afternoon, so we won’t be leaving until Sunday. Without the play, we would have jetted out of time sometime Friday, probably. I’m excited to see my family and visit my beloved Black Hills… but you can imagine after the Christmas Issues, I’m also slightly nervous and gun-shy.
Well, but we’re going to have fun and ignore any drama/bullshit that gets flung our way. That’s my sincere plan.
So that’s basically it in a nutshell. It sure doesn’t *sound* like a “whirlwind” when I see it all typed out. I think, perhaps, it’s more of an emotional shitstorm than anything. Sad friends are leaving, worried about their foster child, relieved and lightened to know he can go with them, overcome with thoughts of them not being near anymore, pride in watching my daughters being so grown up, brain-buzzing with all of the packing/travel to-do lists, heart-swelling catching glimpses of the girls on stage performing, Nervous Tummy thinking about seeing my dad’s girlfriend (or whatever she is, as they’ve “broken up but not really” kind of thing), bummed watching another summer slip through our fingers, shivers of anticipation thinking of cool fall weather and apples and clogs and sweaters, excited for our upcoming vacation…
I’m trying to give each emotion it’s own little slot on a time card, so each can be felt and tended to with due-diligence. Still, it’s hard to not let the all coming running at me at once.
Whirlwind.
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3 thoughts on “Whirlwind

  1. Yes, Erin, exactly: emotions are more exhausting than.. activities.

    I think getting out of town for a week will help… always gives me more perspective, more sense of calm and peace and “everything’s fine” etc. Actually, I think I need to step out of my environment more often. Like, say, in February…

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